Turning 33



Turning 33 has me a bit scared.  Not as scared as 25 or even 30, but scared.  I don't know how to explain it, but I guess since 32 wasn't an easy year for me (health-wise), or even 31, I'm nervous that 33 won't be much better.  And so far, my last day of 32 has stunk (and it's only 10 o'clock!).

To kick off 33, I'm going to give you 33 things that I'm thankful for every day.  In no particular order......

1. Josh. He's the most amazing man, father, and husband. He represents the true meaning of completing me. I cannot imagine my life without him, not even a little bit.  There's not one person in this world who's more compassionate, caring, selfless and forgiving than him.

2. My children.  I cherish every second I spend with them, I'm so glad that God loved me enough to choose me to be their mommy!

3. Having a mother who loved me enough to make tough choices.  It wasn't easy for her to make the choices she made, but she made them for my quality of life (and hers), and for that, I can never thank her enough.

4. Having the kind of relationship with my grandparents that most grandchildren dream of.  I can't imagine one day without either of them.

5. My uncles.  They're like my big brothers and I'm so thankful to have them.

6. Having the ability to make mistakes.  I won't lie, I've made some big ones...but I wouldn't be who I am today without making them and I learned so many lessons from them.

7. My extended family.  I love that I know all of my great-aunts and their children and their children.  It makes me proud to be a part of a big family.

8. Facebook.  Facebook makes it possible to keep up with all my extended family that I love so much....and now I get to watch all of their children's children grow up.  It's so fun to keep in touch with all of them.

9. Friends.  I have some friends that are old and some that are new....and a few that I've lost along the way.  But over the years, I've learned that each friendship provides something you need at that time to grow and nurture.  I've cherished every friendship I've ever had--even the ones I've lost.

10. God.  There have been many times I've felt lost and alone, but when I take a step back, I can see that God truly is the reason for everything and even in the darkest of days, God is there with me.

11. Sunshine and warmth.  Before this year, I didn't realize how much my body would suffer from cold and wet weather....and while I enjoy that weather SO much, I'm more thankful than ever for sunshine and warmth.

12. Grandma Gladys.  Oh how I miss her so.  I know it would be unrealistic to think she could still be with us today, but I can wish, can't I?

13. Aunt Mary.  My wish on this one isn't unrealistic--she left us all too soon.  I only hope that she and her mom (Grandma Gladys) share tea parties and watch over me and my family.

14. Grammy.  Josh's grandmother was very dear to me.  She made a very big wish of mine come true and I will never be able to thank her enough.

15. Forgiveness.  I never thought this was so important, but it is.  It's the key to happiness and I've had to learn along the way to learn how to forgive.  I'm still working on one big act of forgiveness so I can be set free, but I've learned the value...and I'm so glad that I did.

16. I love you.  The three little words mean so much.

17. Love. How great is it that we're allowed to feel such feelings about others?

18. Rainbows. Every time I see a rainbow, I think of someone that's no longer here with us on earth...and I feel like that's there way of telling me they're okay.

19. My house.  While I say everyday how much I hate this house, I'm fortunate that we have a house to call a home.

20. My education.  I long to go back for my Masters and maybe some day, I will, for now, I'm thankful that I left college debt-free and with my Bachelors.

21. Publix. While most companies are still struggling to make it, I'm thankful that I work for a company that's continually posting profits and growing.

22. My job.  While I've had to come to peace with it in the last few months and accept that this will be my forever job if I want to stay with Publix, I'm at least thankful that I enjoy what I do everyday.

23. Life lessons and Murphy's Law.  They exist for a reason and while I suffer from Murphy a lot (lol!), I'm thankful that each one teaches me something new!

24. My rheumatologist.  I get angry with him (and frustrated even!) and there are times I want to bite his head off, but he's the first person to get to the bottom of everything and he's trying to help.  So, I'm being patient and I'm thankful for him.

25. Rico.  He is the one person (besides Josh of course) that I can go to without being judged, crucified, or shamed.  He will help me out of any bind.  He's the most loving, caring, supportive person I've ever met and I can't imagine a day without him there.  I'm so thankful for him!

26. Beauty.  I don't know how to embrace my own....I wish I knew how.  My goal everyday is to learn, but I'm thankful that it's more than skin deep.

27. Pictures.  They capture the moments, good and bad, that we want to remember forever.

28. Laughter.  It rings in our ears and reminds us of the fun that we've had.  It's a joyous sound.

29. Sleep.  It's so important.  I never knew how much until this year.

30. Hugs and kisses.  Enough said.

31. Tears. I've shed a lot of them this past year....both over how my body feels and over hurt, sadness, anger, and happiness.  I'm thankful that I feel free to shed them and loved.

32. Future.  I'm thankful that everyday is a new tomorrow and that tomorrow always brings a new start.  I can't wait to see what the future holds and watch my children grow.

33. Me.  I'm thankful everyday that I can be who I am without reservation.  That I have family and friends that accept me for who I am. 

Here's to 33 bringing more laughter than tears and more hugs and kisses!